I cried, ugly cried to God. Feeling utter despair, extreme loneliness, pressure from demands of work and life, I cried ” I can’t do this, I’m crushing, I am melting down. I really need your help Jesus!!!”
Just when I thought my grace is under pressure, that i can’t hold it in and suck it up any longer…
He showed up. He reminded me that I am accepted and beloved, that I am not alone, He cares about me. His presence so intense. His peace so aggressive it displaces the tornado in my mind. Though my eyes can’t see him, my heart can.
Finally I heared Him say ” My grace is sufficient for you. This is our secret code. These were the words I clung onto through the various storms of my life. Overwhelmed by the memories of how He walked with me through previous valleys of shadow of death; tears flowed. This time, the tears felt like a dam released, letting go.
In a moment of absolute abandonment, I can see clearly immediately. The strongholds of anxiety, fear, loneliness, despair came crushing down and melting away like ice cream on a hot summer day.
Total surrender in trust: Allowing myself to free fall into the unknown, enveloped by His everlasting arms of love.
I can never fully grasp the depth of His love for me or fathom the magnitude of His grace. Time and again I am reminded that His grace is sufficient for me and that is all I need.
but He has said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you [My lovingkindness and My mercy are more than enough–always available–regardless of the situation]; for [My] power is being perfected [and is completed and shows itself most effectively] in [your] weakness.” Therefore, I will all the more gladly boast in my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ [may completely enfold me and] may dwell in me.
2 CORINTHIANS 12:9 AMP